“Crowded” star Mia Serafino appears to have leaked the nude selfie photos below online.

Clearly these nude photos are Mia’s way of trying to audition for a spot as an anal only concubine in the harem of a virile Muslim man. Of course this certainly comes as no surprise, as the pleasures women (and dancing boys) receive from having their anal cavity stretched by a massive Muslim manhood are indescribable.

Unfortunately for Mia, after carefully reviewing these pics I have determined that her ass (though certainly quite tight) is not nearly hairy enough for the tastes of us pious Muslims. The best Mia could hope for with a butt like her’s is to serve as a taint tickler or possibly a left ball suckler… Positions that are undeniably favorable to her pathetic career thus far in heathen Hollywood.